autumn days

Monday, November 24, 2014

Uncle Bill's Girl

I have a father.  I am his daughter.  My own daughter has an incredibly loving father.  I am only now beginning to understand what this means to others, being Daddy's girl.  I watched a cheesy video last week that portrayed the blissful connection between a daddy and daughter as they go out on a date.  I watched in confusion, not understanding why people were so touched by the video.  Only when I could put the face of my beloved Uncle Bill in the daddy role, his daughters as his beloveds, did I burst into tears at feeling the love they share.  My heart hasn't known until now the love a father and daughter can share.  From my childhood I recall trying to avoid my father, trying to protect myself from his emotional and physical violence.  These defensive walls still protect me as an adult.  As I acknowledge and mourn the loss of a safe childhood relationship with my father, my daily quote speaks straight to my heart.

"Grief is a felt experience of love for something lost or that we are losing.  That is an incredibly powerful doorway." -Chris Jordan

This loss I feel may be turned into an incredible learning opportunity.  What do I choose to do with this new lesson?  I choose to see such beauty in the healthy love between daddies and daughters.  I choose to bring more of that into my life, my children's lives.  I choose to support my partner in loving his daughter.  I choose to nurture and nourish their relationship with one another, through date time, praying for divinity in their connection, getting out of the way of the joy they find in one another, and asking them to detail what they love about each other.  Following through on this intention helps me to see results; I see my daughter and her daddy growing closer and sharing more joyful adventures.  My partner doesn't do everything my way, which is a good thing.  He is such a patient, loving parent to our cherished children.

On my journey, I was born to one mother and father.  I love and appreciate them, connect with them in safe ways, and cherish my life they made possible.  Lucky for me, I also get to be mentored by many others.  Two months ago I finally met my dad's brother, Uncle Bill.  Uncle Bill looks at me in a way that melts my heart and makes my eyes water, with such incredible, abundant, unconditional love.  Just thinking of him brings me right back into our loving connection.  The love of a father for his daughter.  I love him right back.  Completely.  I am Uncle Bill's girl.

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